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Looking for the patterns in static... [entries|friends|calendar]
...They start to make sense the longer i'm at it.

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January 22nd, 2006
[ mood | aggravated ]

so things have been gay lately.
and i just feel like crying. and telling everyone in my life to fuck off.
and i think i would be completly better off in my life without anyone in it.
so everyone fuck off.
the end.

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October 27th, 2005
[ mood | sick ]

Two days.
just two more days.

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its been awhile. [Monday
October 24th, 2005
[ mood | crushed ]

so much has happend.
you dont even know.
me and eddie broke up like a month or two ago.
and me and shannon started..a whatever...a realtionship that wasnt such a great one. hes amazing though. but last night we ended things...just cause being friend was the best thing for us at this point.
the bled and underoath is deff on saturday though and i'll be spending the best night of my life with the best people in the world.
so what a deal. thos are like the major tings that happend
went to homcmming last saturday. it was great. i had lots of funnn. dinnner with alot of people.. homecomming and then my place afffter. what a treat. and plus with aonly the coolest people. tiffy didnt get to come:( it made me sad. but there always gunna be more weekend hangouts. casue there always is.
gosh its been so long since i've updated this thing. and thinking that i had so much to type...theres really not that much things that were missed.

so i guess i'll try and keep updating as soon as possible..
but myspace has taken over my life.
ha and shcool and friends.

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so. my future job(s) [Wednesday
July 6th, 2005
so i finally decided what i want to do when i get out of high school i wasnt to go to cosmetic school thingy and alos a fashion design school so i can major in thos two things. i want to either be a fashion designer or a fashion merchandiser along with being a cosmatoligist, as a side thing. and open up my own salon. yup that what i wanna do.

but im kinda of sketchy about that becasue theres really no fashion schools in maine, the closest one is in new your and i wont be around eddie if i got to new yourk unless he comes with me:(

oh yeha and no one really reads my jounal anymore.
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June 23rd, 2005
[ mood | ecstatic ]

I Absalutlyaodreandlove eddie wih all my heart
and its been a halfayear for us. and Im inlovewiththisboy.<323849058677625249

So today is basically just a lazy day and a cleaningthehouseday.
And hanging out with eddie and whom ever.

Friday My grandmother is comming to visit.
eddies gunna meet her.

Saturday I'm going to kory's thing with his and eddies band and dead season.
and so on.

Sunday Eddie and I are going to old orchard beach.
to swimandplayontherides. and play.

then my summer is gunna start from there.
I also passed all my classes this here. sotakethat.

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a whale on a floppy beach. a cow grazing in the grass [Thursday
June 16th, 2005
so i havnt updated in a while. a long a while a almost 2 month while. well today was the last day for classes and was the best white day ever. I loved it. gym was the best. allssa flopped down on the floor and i said alysa you looked like a whale on a floppy beach but i ment to say a floppy waile on a beach owell. and she called my a cow grazing in grass or somehtingh of the other. and me and felcia kept grabbing butts and boods. me fee, gracie, and katlyn talk all last block and we all are going to hang out. sometime. this weekend im suppoded to go to old orchard but i dont think i am cause eddie cant get a hold of his dad. saturday i think im going to the ally, i havnt been there in foreever so we'll see who we can find. and so on an d so on.

i'll update later possibly if your lucky...

comment me crackwhore<3
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Well Well Well... [Monday
April 25th, 2005
[ mood | bored ]

eh, I rember when i first started this lj thingy I was obsessed with it. I updated alomost everyday..sometimes 3 times a day or more. I think the problem is is that i have no time for it. but i love typing in it and reading the comments that i raly get. and i love playing around with the colors. hmm I dont know im trying to update more recently.

okay well my vacation was pretty good. I hung out with eddie most of the time go figure. hmm That basically it there really nothing fun and exciting that happend.

today, monday I went to school felt like crap i had bad tummy pains and i was half dead an d tired. and eddie kind of made me mad but not much where im like gunna start bitching about it. and then i came home and startedd fixing my live journbal an d such.

okay we'll i'll update later.
later cuntfaces.

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Vacation. [Sunday
April 17th, 2005
So starting at the begining of the week, theres not much that happend casuei hardly rember.
but friday i went fising with eddieward and larry. eddie causght a picler i guess i dont know what there called.
then i stayed at eddies for the night. then in the morning we went to the softball feild with derek, josh and jason. it was okay.
it was such a beautiful day out so me and eddie spent our day washing dads care wich was filthy. then he took us out for an ice cream since we did such a good job on his car. then we had a bbq. it was good.
and today eddie and i are going fishing and hoping to catch lots of fish.
and i might stay at his house for the night tonight.


I 'll update when i get the chance.
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April 6th, 2005
[ mood | pissed at eddie ]

So not another surprise.
Im mad at eddie again becasue he ditched me again today. and this is not the first time. but he already had plans with me...buttthey wernt finalized untill 3rd block when he told kkory he was hanging out with me instead of band practice, and he told me today last block and i got mad beecause hes said he would stop but he hadnt, and then he goes i'll come over at four, but like no one understands my point, my point is he ditched me, and then he said he spends his whole time with me, but if e feels that way why make plans with me in the first place. and if your gunna make plans dont break them.

so he broke one of his many prmises with me today.
and blah blah blah.

everyting is so messed up between me and him lately.

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New LayOut. [Tuesday
March 29th, 2005
[ mood | tired and accomplished. ]

So I stayed up late, unsleepy and waiting for my clothes to by dryed doing this. I made a new layout that I love. Thanks amy for that site. it helped alot. So i love the colors and I made my icon and the bacround image. extreamly easy and simple.

Friday I slpt over alyssa's house. we whached movies and thats basically it.

But I havn't Updated in a long while.
saturday. Eddie came over. We went shopping I got some new sun glasses pimper than my freakin dad can ever be(gross?) anyways, I bought two new tank tops, Ones black with a bow and ones ble with lace at the top and sequence and a bow. Its pretty.

Sunday FOr EAster my Dad got me a Greeen bunny thats huge. Eddie help picking him out. and than I went to my aunts and we had a dinner nad everything i got to hang out with my baby cousin which was pretty fun. and then we left around 8, I got home and called eddie and we talked for a bit.

so you guys should leave me comments.
casue im out.
later cunts:)

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eh. [Tuesday
March 8th, 2005
[ mood | im all alone for tonight. ]

Today I woke up, I absalutly did not feel like going to school, I had a huge freakin headache, Then asked dad if i could saty home he said yes. so i went back to sleep. woke up, went back to sleep again and now im here typing.

Yesterday I went to Eddie's house, we had the house to ourselves, so we hung out ate supper and whatched a movie. then my dad came and picked us up. I didnt want to leave eddie, but i had too. so when i got home i called him, and we talked for a bit, then i went to bed around 9:30 yeah i know i usually go to bed at 11. owell.

Sunday me and Eddie went to the movies. kind of boring, but i was with him so it was good.

saturday I satyed home and was all by myself.
Friday edward stayed the night me and him both had a cold so we slpet and cuddled and both felt terribly bad. and then he left at 1 in the afternoon. i was suppsed to go to his on sayurday evening but he forgot and made other planse. i was kind of pissed but i got over it.

and yeah. thats basically it.

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Its Been Awhile. [Thursday
February 24th, 2005
[ mood | Tired with a stuffy nose. ]

Wow, I havn't updated in the longest freakin time, sorry guys. I've been really busy and the computers been messed up, and dad finally fixed it.

so Just on sunday It has been 2 months for me and eddie.
We are really happy together and Its the greatest thing.
Im in love and it feels soo good. We are really good together, everything is just so perfect, we can be totally stupid around eachother and ot feel the slightest bit shy. and its a very open relationship we talk through things and we laugh and kiss and all that great stuff. Okay im sorry im rambling on about this.

Uh lets see, Vacation is going pretty good, spendinga alot of time with edddie, and saturday i might hang out with megan. whitch would be cool.
hmm i really can't rmeber anything that ha s happend.

But I got a cold, and i think it might have been mono im not sure. iOne day I woke up with a really bad sore throat and I kept getting tired easly, and also I woke up in the middle of the night with this really sharp pain on my left side, it might have been my spleen not sure, i couldnnt even walk or sit down for long so yeah. but im all better now.

uh well im gunna go now, I'll try to update more later. And I'll try to keep up now.


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yeah this sucks [Monday
January 31st, 2005
so My liejournal or whaever is like messed up. it says no one has update in like the past 5 days..4 maybe and thats crazy casue at least one person would update...a day. so im mad. maybe its just my computer but this sucks. I might make a new lj or whaever i havent decided yet. but owell.

i thought i would state that.

I'll update about cool stuff later.
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so my wekend kind of sucked sept for one thing [Sunday
January 23rd, 2005
[ mood | worried about Edward ]

WEll all last week was mid-terms. Friday I spent the whole day with my one and only Eddie. Saturday I was supposed to go to megans around 5 but dad didnt want to take me becasue of the storm and he didnt feel like driving me. so I went to the bowling ally instead;. I couldnt get a hold of eddie, to ask if he wanted to come with me. It was soo boring so when I got home I went to bed. Sunday I woke up at 10 in the morning me hearing my dad say I have bad news, Eddies in the hospital, he had a snowbording accedent. So I called his mom and asked if it was okay if i went and visted him. So around ! i showed up with a rose and a card and I gave him a kiss and a hug. Hes okay He hass a bruised spleen. He cant eat anytrhing but poscicals but he doesnt like thme casue he didnt feel good after eating on, so he hasnt eaten all day. His mom kept fighting with his dad and hes in alot of pain. I stayed till 8. Hes in there for 5 to seven days so I dont know what im gunan do with out him in school. But Im probably gunna visit him when my dad gets goem from work. and he'll call me. and god i dont know hwat i would have done if something worce would have happend. yeah his friend tiney complemented me in a way he said you have a nice veiw outside and eddie goes yeah to bad i cant see it, and then he goes well all you have to do is turn around and see her.. somehting like that and he said eddie would be dumb to ever let me go.

God Im in love with him I really am.

but im gunna go. I havnt decided if im gunna go visit himn tomarrow. depends if he wants me too.

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I guess I should update. [Monday
January 17th, 2005
[ mood | aggravated ]

okay well...I got grounded for the weekend from friends, and today i am ungrounded. Only becasue feess little mommy had to get into mine and my brothers buisness and told my dad that we skipped. and she ruined my birthday party. so I hate her. I lost so much respect for her, and she said that my dad isnt the best father figure becasue hes never home...well you know what Im sorry that my fucking dad has to support and take care of two fucking teenage kids, ANd he only has one income and that crap. and = one of fees parents are home from when she gets home from school. well im not going to fees house for awhile. casue thats just crap. I just can't stand when people say my dad isnt a good dad when really hes the best one, there might now be alot of rules, but we still get in trouble, he sets us straight. personnally i think fess mom needs to stay in her own buissness and not say crap like that about my dad. Sorry fee I dont mean to offend you. but thats just how I feel.

On a second note mid terms are this week i get out at 9:30 on tuesday and thursdays and 11:30 on the others. but thursday megans comming over, and then im probably gunna be staying the night at her house this weekend.

and On the 29th will be a month for me and eddie the third.

okay so I htought I would update. later

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My birthday is on thursday bizzzznatches. [Monday
January 10th, 2005
[ mood | relaxed ]

okay first of all, thursday is my god damn freakin birthday and im more excited than anything. because its one number closer to being sweet 16. ohh yeah. anyways. I have everything i could ask for, I have the greatest firends in the world and I have the MOST wonderfullest boyfriedn in the whole entire universe and im soo in love with him, like words cant even explain it. i dont think nothing ccan. ahh its crazy.

Soo all you fuckers should wish me a happy birthday, well if you want to of cours. it would make me feel cool.

and tomarrow is annies birthday. and thats cool. oh yeha she'll be the big 15 also.

well yeah nothing really has happend i just wanted to state that my birthday is comming up. get me somehting good. hah. :)

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I think i really hit the bing one. [Tuesday
January 4th, 2005
[ mood | Im in Love with him ]

Well first off, today was okay. Science was just funny as hell. me and alyssa started a physical fight and she ended up winnig casue im scared of her. hah. ehh owell.. then i ate those candy runtst thing and all of a sudden my stomach started hurting. ahh I got so mad. so during break I went to go ciist the love of my life eddie. and we talked and he found someone who might sing for his band. The guys name is tyler, he is cool he just moved here...he has a black mohawk, umm his labret peirced you know good ol' stuff like that. and so I was excited, and Im sure he was most deffinatly happy. And now im home becasue I skipped last 2 blocks i had. I need to stop. Im turning out like my brother..who doesnt even go to school anymore. ehh.. owell.

Okay anyways. I think Im in love with eddie. I dont know. This is a different feeling than I felt with Kory. like I think with kory it was fake. like our "realtionship"..wasnt even one. ANd with Eddie we actully talk liek there not one bit of silene..well whne we are kissing..hah. anyways and like we just love being together..and i love being with him. and I can talk to him about anything. God i can be a scrub around him its cool. lol well emmbarssing but owell. But he always makes the first move, annd I think its about time i do something. so Im going to give him a suprice. only a few know what it is. im not gunna even bother mentioning it. uhh lets ee..so we talked abotu what we might do for the big valitines day. I want to go to friendlysd casue i lvoe that place..or like ruby tuesdays but i rather have friedlys. yummy. owell I love him I do I do I do.

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Pretty good end of the week and weekend. [Sunday
January 2nd, 2005
[ mood | so effin dead tired! ]

So starting wensday, I stayed the night at Alyssa's with anna. But before jarron came over with sara and megan, (not garland, i forgot her last name) and we got anna and then went to walmart,, and just hung out for a while. then my dad came home and me and anna went to alyssa's. we had fun we played life, and me and anna sucked at it. we need new ones. Uhh then we whatched movies, I was the second to crash, i crashed after misty. oh yeah before all that stuff, we sang and danced to the used and TBS, and me and alyssa found out we can scream. yay.

THen on thursday, Anna and Alyssa came back to my house, we just chilled for a little while, then Eddie came over and he played his bass for us. While alyssa and anna were down stairs, me and eddie just talked for a while and he said he was falling in love with me. aw i was gunna cry. Im really happy with him and Its so much better than mine and korys. Me and Eddie actully have communications and im so much more comfertable with im, and kory told eddie all of this crap about me and said I was a mistake. It was sad, i just wanted to cry. and I asked if eddie thought i was a mistake so far and he said NO. so that was good. Im glad he didnt listen to kory and he came to me to find out the truth and crap. honesty and loyalty is also in our relationship and its good. Im soo much more happier in this relationship. and my dad actully likes eddie. lol. SO yeah at 10:30 eddie had to go home and alyssa and anna stayed the night, eddie intentnally left his bass here since he was comming over on friday and when me and alyssa and anna came home, I played it for a while thne i had to go pee...and alyssa like untuned it or somehting and at first we thought we broke it. then around 11 we wnet to bed. we were pooooped.

Friday, Me Anna and Alyssa just kind of went lazy. And then My dad had me do a new years eve cleaning thing since i was gunna have a little get together thing. Eddie came over around 1. and we just hung out more, and went grocery shopping and all of this..then we whatched movies then around 8 chris and brittany came over. ANd they and anna went to the store, me and eddie and alyssa stayed whatching movies. Then Jarron and Sara and Megan came over for like 15 minutes. they had me make pizza and they didnt even stay to have some. owell. someone broke my fairy that vicky got me, oweell I'll fix it. ANd then me and eddie crashed in seans rom, we stayed up talking till like 5:30 in the morning just talkign baout all this crap. and we had fun. We played parcheesy. the bord game( inside joke with my dad and us). THen alyssa and brittany and anna and chirs stayed up all morning till like 6 whatching mtv2 since they couldnt find the controller. then around 3 we had brunch. eddie and alyssa cooked. me and anna clead our stove. and they think im "anerexic, because i dont eat all the time, I only eat when I'm hungery and when i eat i get full fast. I only ate one peice of pizza on friday, and then saturday i ate eggs and some of my sauges. And after that we all just kinda went lazy and layed and whatched tv. anna was on the comp alll day long. and i fell asleep on eddie. God I was so tired. It wasnt even funny. then around 6 everyone went home. I went to sleep around 9 and woke up around 2 in the morning with this peircing pain in my thigh. i couldnt walk on it. and yeah.

so thats basically all I did. and today I just kinda layed around the house and made my bed with fresh clean sheets. and whatched comady central with my brother.

SO yeah. later bizzzzznatches

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So heres what happend. [Tuesday
December 28th, 2004
[ mood | oh boy! ]

Fisrt of all last ngiht I went to the movies with vikki, Fee, Eddie, and myself. we went tos ee meet the fuckers. good movie. Yes it is. better than meet the parents.

Uhh Then that night I stayed the night at my vicky poos with fee. we had a blast.

then today fee dropped me off at home. Uhh i walk into my room and I see the marilyn Monroe purse that I wanted on my computer desk. I called my dad and I was gunna cry. And then I went into the shower..and half way through rinsing my hair out, Jare bare comes knowcking on the door. i stopped the shower to see who it actully was. and i was nudy in my towel..how unnatractive. He can drive, So me him and alshia went for a pimpin cruis. Hes so great. Hes one of my best est friends! oh yess he is.

so umm maybe tonight I might be hanging out with eddie. niceness.

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December 26th, 2004
[ mood | calm ]

and we'll sing
we'll sing like murderers in choirs.

So yeah. Hopefully for my birthday my daddy will get me the stilleto formal cd, becasue im just effen in love with them! ahh gash.


New Years resalution.
1. Loose about 5 more punds.
2.Go to the taste of Chaos
3. Go to as much concerts as I can go to.
4. Save up lots and lots of money.
there is more, but right now I can't think of any. but trust me theres tons.

ANd hopefully I will have money by like april? some time around there to buy my new digital camera so I too can be a camera whore. I love pictures, and my digital camera now is broken and sucks.

Okay well my Wishful thinking self is going now.

oh yeah, if anyone, wants to let me in on how to post pictures, i'll be one grateful girl, casue im really uh stupid when it comes to all this html stuff, i only know a few.

Okay so Me and Amy have been on Livejournal for like 5 million hours..around there trying to figure out how to do some cool stuff to our journals, with our luck we got no where but close to somewhere, we can make our letter go across the page, blod, italic letters, lj cut, and somewhat adding pictures. and yeah. We also took the time to Fix our colors. I am happy with the way mine and amys colors turned out cause ours are just almost pimping.Geesh I guess you just have to be really smart to use html with out getting confused. owell at least we got almost somewheres. so in Various spos in this entry i used the tricks I learned tonight. You should be proud.

pv4eh Thats Ay my partner in crime!

Leave its orgasmo, if you decide to leave anything at all.

<3Fucking gorgeous

Im lying just to keep you here

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